Wednesday, December 13, 2006

To My Party

You have given me fraternity toward the unknown man.
You have joined the strength of all the living.
You have given me the country again as in a birth.
You have given me the freedom that the loner cannot have.
You taught me to kindle kindness, like fire.
You have given me the rectitude that the tree requires.
You taught me to see the unity and the difference among mankind.
You showed me how one being's pain has perished in the victory of all.
You taught me to sleep in beds hard as my brothers.
You made me build on reality as on a rock.
You made me adversary of the evildoer and wall of the frantic.
You have made me see the world's clarity and the possibility of happiness.
You have made me indestructible because with you I do not end in myself.

Suggested read : Pablo Neruda

Suggested rythm : Imagine , Lennon

Monday, December 11, 2006

Tomato Ketchup

In our country,
A woman who writes poetry,
Is eyed as an odd fish.
Every man presumes
That in her poems
He is the issue addressed!
And since it is not so,
He becomes her foe.
In this sense,
Sara didn´t make many enemies.
She didn´t believe in giving explanations.
Before she could become the wife of a poor writer,
She had already become
The sister-in-law of the whole town.
Even the lowliest of them
Claimed to have slept with her!
All day long,
Jobless intellectuals of the city
Buzzed around her.
Even those who had jobs,
Would leave their stinking files and worn out wives
To come to her,
Leaving behind the electricity bill,
And the children´s school fees and wife´s medicine.
For these are the concerns
Of lesser mortals.
Morning through late night,
Heated discussions would take place
On literature, philosophy and current affairs.
When hunger knocked in at their empty stomachs,
Bread and boiled pulse
Would be bought collectively.
Great thinkers,
Would then demand tea
Declaring her the Amrita Preetam of Pakistan.
Sara, the gullible,
Would be very pleased with herself.
Perhaps, there were some reasons for it.
Those who were responsible for supporting her,
Always fed her on Kafka coffee
And Neruda biscuits.
Because of saliva-soaked compliments,
At least, she could have one meal,
Everyday!
But for how long?
She had to free herself
From the clutches of wolves.
Sara preferred to leave the jungle itself.
As long as she lived,
The connoisseurs of Art
Kept nibbling her.
In their circle,
She is still considered delicious,
But with a difference:
They no longer can take a bite of her!
After her death,
She had been elevated
To the status of Tomato Ketchup!

Suggested read : Perveen Shakir

Thursday, December 07, 2006

"Mother"

Mother do you think they'll drop the bomb
Mother do you think they'll like the song
Mother do you think they'll try to break my balls
Ooooh aah, Mother should I build a wall

Mother should I run for president
Mother should I trust the government
Mother will they put me in the firing line
Ooooh aah, is it just a waste of time

Hush now baby, baby don't you cry
Mama's gonna make all of your
Nightmares come true
Mama's gonna put all of her fears into you

Mama's gonna keep you right here
Under her wing
she won't let you fly but she might let you sing
Mama will keep baby cosy and warm
Ooooh Babe Ooooh Babe Ooooh Babe
Of course Mama's gonna help build the wall

Mother do think she's good enough for me
Mother do think she's dangerous to me
Mother will she tear your little boy apart
Oooh aah, mother will she break my heart

Hush now baby, baby don't you cry
Mama's gonna check out all your girl friends for you
Mama won't let anyone dirty get through
Mama's gonna wait up till you get in

Mama will always find out where
You've been
Mamma's gonna keep baby healthy and clean
Ooooh Babe Ooooh Babe Ooooh Babe
You'll always be a baby to me
Mother, did it need to be so high.

Suggested read : Floyd

Suggested rythm : I dont wanna be a soldier mama , Lennon

Monday, November 13, 2006

King of Ayodhya

Time and place has lost its significance. I haven't slept for days now. I lose consciousness every now and then, rest of the time life is just a blur. My head pains as if it had hit some rock, this headache is killing me. Sometimes I feel like father is sitting right beside me and his fingers are moving through my matted locks , then I open my eyes and all the pain begins.

The whole family is here, orphaned, abandoned, they want me to return to Ayodhya.All the great seers and sages are here in Chitrakoota with me. Vasistha, the great sage, says I need to return to Ayodhya and take up the burden of Kingship. Only the eldest son becomes King, that has been the Ishkavu tradition. Bharatha cries at my feet begging me to be king, Laxmana will go with me, wherever I go. I am unable to grasp anything they are saying. I knew that father would one day be gone, like everybody else, but today life has lost its purpose. I feel betrayed. I feel like a warrior betrayed, a child betrayed. I am not angry, I am not conscious enough to be angry.

I have seen the pride in my father's eyes every time I came home victorious after battles, after pacifying Parashuram, after defeating Vishwamitra's enemies. There is no one else in the world who admired me so, but my father. When I vanquish the whole of south and return as the greatest warrior ever, whom do I go home to. If it was not for that look in my father's eyes, would I have taken up this dangerous mission. Now what is all this struggle worthy of, whom do I tell all my stories to.

I performed the final rites for the departed soul.I fed my father's soul with darba grass and oil cake, and then I bathed in the cold water of Mandakini. Mandakini felt like Sarayu back home, I felt my father's touch. On his long journey to some other world I wished my father well, he blessed me on my incomplete journey in this world. I rose from the river and all the seers and sages bowed before the new King of Ayodhya. I appointed Bharatha, my younger brother as my deputy ; Shatrughna, my youngest brother and Laxmana's twin as the commander of Kosala's armies. On the banks of Mandakini, I held my first court as Kosala's dispenser of destinies.

Bharatha and the seers want me back in Ayodhya, leaving the mission incomplete. Jabali suggested that Laxmana head the southern push and build buffer zones to prevent a southern incursion. Vasistha suggested building a stronger Arya Varthi force based out of the plains. I was surprised nobody talked about Ravana and the riches of Lanka. It was as if Ravana's overthrow was a distant fantasy. I had to take decisions, I was the decider now. I could feel the real burden of Kingship.

I told the court that we cannot busy ourselves with the nutty gritty of tradition and day to day governance, while forgetting the future of Ayodhya and our people. A southern push was inevitable and if that meant locking horns with Ravana, we should be doing it. I told them that without the resources of the south and peace with the southern dominions, the northern empires will continue the decline. I told them that there comes a time in the history of nations when they have to wake up from slumber and wield the weapon however cosy the slumber might be. I told them that securing the south for Ayodhya will mean one empire with an all powerful king streching from ocean to the himalayas. Even the northern dominions will be annexed into Kosala, I did not hide my intentions. An empire with no caucuses, an empire for our way of life. I told the court that Bharatha, my deputy will govern over Kosala for me and I, the King will continue with my mission. We will secure the south, with or without Ravana. I wished Bharata and the ministers well, as the King I asked them to keep the Ishkavu flag flying high. I was amazed that I could speak so well, then I am King.

I adjourned the court and the visitors reluctantly left Chitrakoota one by one. It was dusk and I went back to the river. I felt a chill go up my spine, I crouched by the river gasping for breath. The holy spot where Laxmana and me had performed the puja for father looked like a butcher's shop. There were limbs and blood all over the place, the offerings were scattered here and there. I could see the carcass of two male lions with a deep stench, there was a freshly separated elephant head with blood gushing out into the Mandakini. Intestines, livers and testicles were pasted all over the rocks. This was the most gruesome spectacle I had seen in my life. It was some message which I did not understand. My anger knew no bounds, Laxmana and me set the whole forest on fire, killed every living thing around. Vengeance is the only thing I crave for standing in this circle of fire.

the princes and Sita left Chitrakoota immediately. the fire spread through the banks of Mandakini ; to the south, like a snake.

Friday, November 10, 2006

Love and peace in Chitrakoota

The Chitrakoota mountain rises above the mists of the Mandakini river. It is summer and the forest is full with its fruits. The harmony of the woods and its beasts, the flowers and their fruits, all in this multitude of rocks. Ancient herbs surrounds us and purifies this air, flocks of birds moving from one hill onto another is perhaps the only sound around. The crystal waters of the river reflects back the greenery of the forest. There is calm all around in Chitrakoota, a heaven on earth.

Life has never been so good. Laxmana had built a mud house for the three of us in the mountain. The view from the mountain is breath-taking, its serene. Mountains remind me of the unshakable things in life, of the higher purposes of living. Our little house is cosy and I'm surprised where Laxmana learnt all this from. He knows every fruit that is edible, every animal that can be hunted and every twig that will burn. It was a surprise when Vaidehi walked all this distance through the forest and slid so well into the daily difficulties of this forest life. Laxmana's inventiveness surprises me more than that. If it was not for this difficult times, possibly the best within us would never have come out.

Forest life has its difficulties. There are no paths in the forest and often we clear ways through the jungle which end up in deep ravines or waterfalls. Food is abundant, but cooking the meat is difficult at times, with Janaki so inexperienced with the different animals we hunt everyday. Certain fruits are not edible and often leave a bad taste for days. The animals have been very kind to us though they make weird sounds during the night and Janaki wakes up bewildered and shocked. I dont think Laxmana sleeps any time, I have never seen him sleep and many a times I think of him as a tiger among men which prowls all night. Despite all this we are on our own, without a care, with no fear and no responsibilities. If I had ascended the throne, I would have been pacifying the caucuses and people and losing sleep around that. Compared with that, what a good life we have.

There is something funny with my sleep these days. I see dreams in the wee hours of morning and the next day,the same things happen around me. Yesterday I saw this leopard chasing a black antelope in my dreams and it really happened today in front of my eyes in the western bank of the river. Today I saw black vultures over Ayodhya, whatever that means. It is as if the whole world around me is what I see in dreams. It is fun, but a bit scary at times.

Life is good as Janaki, Laxmana and me sit on this huge moonlit rock overlooking the dark forest below. The sky above is clear and starlit, the air is cool with wafts of sandalwood and jasmine. There is no human being in any conceivable distance. Its just the three of us tonight, and for us, just the kindness of this forest.

Love and peace in Chitrakoota, Ayodhya braces itself as fears of anarchy sets in. Bharata rushes to Chitrakoota with the news of Dasharatha's death.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

And from here to....

This is Ganga flowing at the end of the Kosala countryside, on the farther bank is the forest of Dandakaranya. Ganga, the all encompassing flow, the refiner of minds, the melting place of punarapis. She carries within her the destiny of nations, the germs of future empires. She gives birth, she carries ashes. Has anybody asked her why she flows, what she is searching for.

Sumantra, my charioteer till this point, asked me where this whole thing is headed. He will return back to Ayodhya in the morning, leaving us here in the forest all by ourselves. He is the most trusted friend of the family and I want him to take good care of father. I told him I had no idea. I told him I had to keep my father's word and protect his honour. I told him when I returned back, if at all, maybe father wouldn't be alive, mother may die of grief, maybe he himself wouldn't be living. I might lose Sita or Laxmana on this dangerous journey. I told him this will be a journey of truth, courage and love. This journey will probably be its destination.

Tonight I have seen how much father loved me, I saw him crying like a child when I parted. I have seen the overwhelming emotion in Ayodhya, with people lined on the streets asking me not to go. Laxmana's mother told him to treat and respect me like a father, like a king, to treat the forest like Ayodhya and to treat Sita like herself ; and then she blessed him well. She is a woman of very few words, but I havent heard anything more beautiful, so selfless, ever. Sita insisted on coming, she could have stayed back like a princess with all comforts, but Janaki chose this uncertain path of hardships. I fear she will lament later, on this big waste of her vernal years but she says it is her duty. She says she will go wherever I go.

O Sumantra, look at that young man,my brother, pretending to be busy so late into the night. He is staying guard for me, protecting me like the thousand headed snake that protects the God of light. He is Adi Shesha himself, my constant companion, my friend. I'm not sure where I will be tomorrow but tonight I go to sleep in the warmth of all this love. I dont know whether I deserve it, tonight I'm just thankful to existence. I'm crying now.

the two princes and Sita cross Ganga the next morning and continue their journey through Dandakaranya forest towards Chitrakoota. In Lanka, the poet-warrior smiles.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

the Apocalyptic vision

The Sarayu flows in the darkness, bereft of its constant companion in the sky. Laxmana and me, sat by the ghat listening to the river, deep in thought. Laxmana wants me to go south with the armies, he is angry at father for suggesting Bharatha's name. I am perturbed at this turn of events, we need a new king by dawn and a new warrior.

The Caucuses had a bigger announcement to make earlier in the night. There was an apocalyptic vision by a venerated seer in Himalayas. The seer predicted the doom of all kingdoms from Vindhyas upto the Gandharas, which meant the end of powerful dynasties like Kosalas, Mlechas, Kekayas and the Aryavarthis.The end would be after fourteen years when the Pulastyas of Lanka - the strongest empire on earth, led by their Emperor, the poet-warrior Ravana marches into these holy lands. It wouldn't just be the end of dynasties, Ravana would replace everything - our way of life, our Gods and the way we see it.

The Caucuses were virtually shaken and had taken some hasty decisions. Their decision was to unite all of north under the joint command of the Caucus seniors through Rajasooya, to face the threat from the south, which meant Kosala would be merged with the other kingdoms and there would not be a fifty seventh king in the Sun dynasty. Father brokedown and lost his senses on hearing this. He was terrified at the spectre of the Sun dynasty ending while he was in charge, he couldnt fight against the mighty Caucuses - so he pleaded. The Caucuses made it clear that unless one of the princes takes up the impossible task of killing Ravana, Ayodhya would be annexed. Father agreed to it. I thought he would suggest my name but he chose Bharatha instead. He loved me so much.

Killing Ravana was impossible , but thinking about it was not. His was the richest empire in the world with mightier weapons and gigantic soldiers. He lived in his island kingdom with golden walls, somewhere in the south and that was all I knew. Killing him will be difficult, very difficult. But as the eternal rebel, sage Vishwamitra had told me, every empire will fall one day. If I get hold of Ravana that very day, I'll kill him.

Yesterday night my intention was to invade the south with the four limbs of the army, but for this new mission an army will be of no use. Ravana would crush any army movement across the blue mountains of the south. Laxmana and me influenced the Caucuses through Bharatha's uncle, the Kekaya king, who himself was happy that Bharatha wouldnt have to go. The Caucus announced its final decision on fathers proposal, they wanted me,the eldest son and heir to the throne, to go to the forests in the south and kill Ravana within fourteen years or the Kosala kingdom will be annexed.

I am leaving Ayodhya again. This time with Laxmana and Sita, who insisted on coming. Father said he would die if he parted with me. I felt sad on leaving the old man alone. I am his strength in this old age, but I'm undertaking this task like Bhageeratha to preserve his Dharma. It is the duty of a son to walk the distance his father could not cover. It is a son's duty to complete the journey.

Dressed in plain clothes, the men and Sita leave Ayodhya. Dasharatha dies in pain uttering his son's name.